Bed Space

According to Google;

The king size mattress dimensions are 76 inches wide by approximately 80 inches long – about 18 inches wider than a queen. This is the closest a couple can come to having as much personal space (38 inches) as each would have on a twin bed.

38 Inches per person is that what it says right? That’s what I see too, so riddle me this Batman, why does the wifey & I’s sleeping arrangement look more like this?

I’m not joking this is what it looks like. now let me explain the wifey & I are not small people we need our space.

I bring this up, because last night according to wifey I threw my pillow into her face when I came to bed, now I am not saying I didn’t, but it wasn’t intentional, however dear readers let me explain.

She was over on my side just a little bit more than usual with her pillow, now she will argue this til she’s blue in the face, but c’mon I bet if I took a poll of men, more than 70% would also face this dilemma.

I almost jumped up and measured her space vs mine, because I tell you dear readers my right arm (I sleep on the right side) was on the edge of the KING SIZED bed, but I was afraid I would wake her up, and then “That’s how the fight began.” So I stayed in my little coffin of a space, while she snored directly in my ear (glad I wear ear plugs, but I can still hear the thunderous roars, it’s just not as bad.

Anyway dear readers a miracle happened, it wasn’t intentional I was trying to be the good guy here, but I rolled over….not violently like normal, (sometimes it’s almost like I jump up in mid-air and turn while still in the air then come crashing down, i’m not sure how I do this, I would like to see it on video) just casually rolled over facing the left. She awoke and exclaimed in startled voice “What was that?” I didn’t respond, thinking she may be talking in her sleep. Again she said “What was that?” At this time I realized she was not in a deep slumber so I responded with “What was what?” “That shaking!” she said. I didn’t understand, so I replied with “I rolled over, but there wasn’t any shaking.”

I think what happened was I may have rolled and touched her hand, or pillow, or something since she was over on my side of the bed more than usual. Here is where the miracle happened dear readers

she rolled over back onto her side of the bed, and we both slept uninterrupted til the dawn.

So men, I ask you what is the solution to the bed stealing wives, girlfriends, or significant others in our lives? Or is there even a solution? Are we cursed to live the rest of our lives in our palaces like this? Is it just in our minds and our ladies are correct after all? Are we mad? Is there a way to put a barrier, so neither one of us wake up with black eyes or worse…divorced?

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I’m Back!

I’m back for the moment anyway…….I’ve been on hiatus and broke my sister in law’s heart as she was my #1 fan (sorry about that kid), but I just have to get something off my chest since I couldn’t sleep last night., just what the hell is up with Saturday Night Live lately? I watched last nights episode with Kevin Hart as the host. I don’t have anything against Kevin Hart, I don’t love him like the internet does, but I don’t hate him either. I have enjoyed some of his work, so I don’t blame his performance he was doing the best with what he had I believe.

Now a bit about how much of a fan I am. I started watching SNL in 1975 when it debuted. I would stay up with my parents and watch this “groundbreaking” show. I was only six years old, so the jokes went way past my head with the sexual innuendos and drug references, but I enjoyed the live aspect of it the danger, and risks they took.

I even watched the 80’s seasons that everyone said was the death of SNL with the cast of Anthony Michael Hall, Robert Downey Jr, Julia Louise Dreyfess, Jeanene Garafalo and Rich Hall…..I’m not trying to include the entire seasons casts, but you get my point. I watched them and although they weren’t the risk takers that the previous decade was I still found it watchable and enjoyable.

Then the 90’s came and gave us the rebirth of SNL, and man what a decade that was with such talented performers like Will Ferrel, Tina Fey, Mike Myers, Dana Carvey, the late great Phil Hartman (I still kinda get choke up when I see old episodes with him in them…..so sad), Darrell Hammond (to quote my best friend “Our generation’s Rich Little”), and so on.

So, with SNL’s history of up and downs, who is to blame for these past few seasons? The performers? Maybe…the Writers? DEFINITELY! (this is my opinion, so if you disagree tough). I just did a search for the head writers on SNL and here is what http://snl.wikia.com/wiki/Head_writer lists:

So, let’s take a look at that list for a minute……..Tina Fey was the head writer for Season 25, and was a writer for six years altogether. Those six years were EPIC and really helped with SNL’s popularity with a new generation. Go back and look at those seasons you will see what I am talking about.

Last nights episode may have been a breaking point for me. it was SO bad…….I have a Saturday night ritual where I will watch the show and me and my best friend will text each other during the show with what was good, bad or atrocious….well last night it was all atrocious. I feel bad for the hosts sometimes that have to do these sketches…..sure the audience laughs like they are supposed to, but I promise you they are just abiding by that “Applause or Laugh” sign that is continuously flashing.

So, this is Lorne’s and SNL’s 40th year….that’s a nice career right? Maybe its time to pack it up??? I am not a writer, nor an expert on what makes people laugh, or on television, but I know what isn’t working & this is not working anymore.

This book

Live from New York: An Uncensored History of Saturday Night Live

Told by the stars, writers, & guests in their own words about working on SNL. One host that really stands out to me is Tom Hanks who has hosted SNL eight times says when he is on he will sit down and write with the writers, and  not just a 9-5 time frame. He says they will order Chinese take out, and not leave until the job/jokes are perfect. If that means they are up till 5am on Saturday, and they have to be live that night so be it.

Where is the dedication with this past cast? Chevy, Murray, Beliushi, and that whole cast had to write their own jokes/sketches same with Tina, Will, Amy and so on……I don’t know for a fact, and if I’m wrong PLEASE correct me, but do any other the cast members other than Colin Jost write their own material anymore? I just don’t see it.

I don’t know, maybe I’m getting finicky in my old are, or I am just getting too hard to entertain.

Is 3d Being Over Done?

 

I for one love 3D if it’s made correctly, best 3D I have ever seen was COMING AT YA, anyone ever heard of it? The movie itself sucks balls, but the 3D in is amazing and entire movie every 5 seconds something is COMING AT YA.

I feel 3D is being run into the ground and they are now ruining it. Do we really need 3D tv’s so our favorite sports players can jump out at us??? I don’t need an ugly ass Shaq in my house *Shudder*

And now cable is jumping on the bandwagon and now offering 3D…..it’s run it’s course….as one person said it was cool in the 50’s now it’s just a gimmick.

Again, if it’s done right like the film I mentioned above then by all means make it in 3D, but I don’t want to see Twilight in 3D or anything like that, where only the fight sequences are in 3D.

There, just my 2 cents.